Wednesday, September 26, 2012

The Parable of the Necklace

Within the last few months I have been praying daily for guidance.  And for the past few months I have been in waiting mode.  If you truly know me then you understand that patience is not my greatest attribute.  Wait, who are we kidding, I have absolutely NO patience! 

A few months back my hours at my part time job were cut in half.  Financially, that just wasn't enough.  I won't go into all the details but we are trying to decide if I should pursue full time work outside the home, my husband attempt to find a second job that will work with his floating schedule, or my husband find a new job entirely.  My heart's desire is to stay home full time with my babies. 

After waiting for two months I became very frustrated!  So while I was getting ready that morning I yelled prayed for God to give us an answer.  Within a few minutes I received a call for an interview for a full time position.  The job is something that I went to college to do but it means leaving my kids for 8 hours every day.  Financially it would be a great blessing and help us get out of debt and into a house of our own twice as fast.  But... it is not my heart's desire. 

"God, what are You doing here?  Do you even care?  Why aren't You bringing me home?"

By now you're wondering what this has to do with a necklace right???

I have been taught since I was a small child that God cares for me.  He created me with a purpose and will not forsake me.  I know these truths in my head but I still haven't grasped them in my heart.

So, this past week I decided to go looking for some outfits for family pictures. (I was blessed to have a gift card to one of my favorite stores and my mother-in-law agreed to take our pictures for us!)  As I was trying on shirts I kept thinking and praying about our situation. 

"Why are You not listening to me?  Why do You not care?"

Wow!  I sound like my almost 2 year old whining because He can't have something.

Anyways... I found what I needed and left the store.  When I got home I realized that I had left my favorite necklace in the dressing room.  I called the store as I was driving back and asked if someone had turned in a necklace.  "I'm sorry, there was no necklace in the dressing room and no one has turned one in."  I went on back to the store and searched high and low and while asking God to help me find it.  While I was praying I will confess that I was actually thinking, "He doesn't care.  He's not going to help me.  He never does."

Maybe I'm the only one here who feels that way sometimes.  Things don't go my way and I automatically resort to the false truth that God truly could care less about me.  

I left the store empty handed and mad.  Later that night I was talking with my husband and asking him why things weren't working out.  What did I do wrong?  Why won't God take care of us?  

I whined for the next 2 days.  

But God in His graciousness did not forget me.  

Don't you love that phrase! "But God".  He does not forget us.  He does hear us and He does care for us.  Just like I want to make my boys happy He wants to make us happy.

Two days later I went back to that same store with my mother.  As we were waiting in line I decided to should go to customer service and see if my necklace had been turned in.  The friendly worker said that a necklace had been turned in the night before but my description didn't match the lost & found log.  She went to look at it anyways and guess what... it was my necklace!!!  

But God showed me grace!  

I didn't need that necklace.  I could easily live without it.  But God knew that I really liked it and He in His grace gave it back to me.  

I don't know what our future holds.  I don't know how our financial situation will be resolved.  But I do know that I am God's little girl and He does care for me.  He does hear me and does want to give me my heart's desires.  He wants to take care of me and use me to bring Him glory.  

But God... such powerful words.

My prayer for anyone who reads this (if anyone does) is that you will embrace those two precious words.  He does hear us and He does communicate with us.  You are never alone if you have believed.  

But God...

How has God shown His grace to you?  I would love to hear your stories of But God!

This post is linked with:  Thankful Homemaker, Women Living Well, The Better Mom

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